Mike Cope's blog

Monday, November 15, 2004

Someone at second service yesterday told me she made it through the scriptures I read from Job, Lamentations, Psalms, Matthew, and John during the DVD with images of grief; through my message giving a "scout's report" on ten years of grief (since Megan's death on 11/21/94); through the scriptures that Diane and I read--psalms that had ministered to us through the years; and through hearing Val and others sing "You Raise Me Up." What sent her over the edge was during the closing song seeing little Anna Claire break away from her family, run right in front of the worship team, leap into my arms, and press her cheek against mine. I'd just spoken of losing my little girl. And one of the youngest in the assembly came for me to hold her. That's community.


  • Curt spoke about grief and loss this Sunday, too. It was hard.

    You guys take care.

    By Blogger Q, at 11/15/2004 06:34:00 AM  

  • What can I say to that?

    The Sunday before Megan died, I was late to Highland. You were not there and they were praying for your family...I thought Megan had died and no one had told me. I remember trying to bow my head so no one would see the huge tears streaming down my face and hitting the tile floor beneath my seat. My shoulders were shaking making my movie chair squeak as I tried to quietly weep. Finally someone said something that let me know Megan was still alive. I was so glad I almost laughed out loud. People around me must have thought I was possessed. It was a horrible misunderstanding, but it readied me for the news that was coming just a few days later. How many tears have the cold tile floors beneath the "movie seats" of Highland seen on Megan’s behalf?

    Partly because of you recent post, and partly because I always remember Megan this time of year, I have been reliving that week of November 1994. It seems the memories are much stronger this year. I hope you and Diane know and feel the prayers and the concern directed your way as you face this anniversary. As always, thank you for sharing Megan and your experiences with all of us! May your sharing bless you as much as it blesses all of us!

    By Blogger SG, at 11/15/2004 09:49:00 AM  

  • SG - Every family in crisis needs a sane caretaker. You were ours (or were one of them, anyway). Now I marvel that could have played that role at such a young age. Were you born mature? :)

    By Blogger Mike, at 11/15/2004 10:51:00 AM  

  • Mike, I cried through the whole service. The Spirit was at work in that room yesterday. I needed to uncover some wounds that were pretty fresh and I had been doing a pretty good job of covering up....but my whole facade came crashing down as soon as you mentioned grief. Yesterday was extremely difficult...the whole day after that...but I know that there are times you have to let the grief overwhelm you in order to move to the other side. So, thanks for my tough day yesterday. Today is better. My grief is not related to the loss of a child but church loss. I know there are many out there who can relate to that kind of loss. We, in the name of Christ, inflict so much pain. What is wrong with us that we do that?
    Thanks for your transparency in life...in helps us all.
    grace, julie

    By Blogger julie, at 11/15/2004 03:44:00 PM  

  • wow--thanks, Mike. What a powerful morning! Those Boone children can't be beat.

    By Blogger Brandon Scott, at 11/15/2004 07:32:00 PM  

  • I am not in Abilene to hear the "scars" sermon, but I have a friend who will send it to me. It has been a year and 3 months since the loss of my 19 year-old son. God's church was and is so kind. God embraced us through so many people that to feel loved is an understatement. Every stage of grief brought renewed embracing from some individual or group acting in the name of God. Today, as through the last 2 years, I stand in faith only through the embracing arms of our Father, sometimes through his people.

    By Blogger WDS, at 11/15/2004 08:13:00 PM  

  • It has taken a couple of days for the emotions to settle down a bit - before I could comment here.

    From this advanced age's perspective, there are now so many 'scars' on my heart it looks tatooed. Each scar is a stronger place than those untouched areas, and for that I thank our Gracious LORD!

    One favor Mike.

    Please tell Diane thank you.

    Her participation was intensly powerful - though understated. Thank her for sharing with us.

    By Blogger Kathy, at 11/16/2004 08:42:00 AM  

  • In Cyrano de Bergerac when Cyrano is speaking to Roxanne while she's up on her balcony because Christian is too timid to do so, he tells her to be careful what she says to him because her words coming from that height can hurt his heart. That's kind of the way I feel every time you speak of losing your daughter, Mike.
    I know we all have to greive the loss of our loved ones and we all greive in our own ways. Maybe I'm not handling my grief too well. We lost our boy the day he was born. He was a beautiful child who we were going to name Jubilee. When he died we let our girls name him--on his headstone is Justin Peaceful Reeves. Every time you mention Megan--man, I hope I have spelled her name right, Mike--it hits me like a ton of bricks.
    As we went to counseling after losing Justin I learned one thing--the longer you get to have them, the more you miss them. I can't imagine your loss and the grief you are enduring.
    God bless you in your scouting. Remember that those of us who are receiving the scouting reports are not all seasoned, battle hardened generals who can handle the realities of that journey out there without a great deal of pain. As Cyrano might say, keep those words coming from way up there as light as possible and still tell the truth.
    Love you.......

    By Blogger jim, at 11/16/2004 08:20:00 PM  

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